I'm A Dreamer: Found Guilty Of Imagination

Not only do I imagine being free to be myself -- I would like to dance in the rain for real too. (photo credits at the end of the post. Used with a CC licence)
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You know those school magazines where some creative classmate of yours comes up with a seloka or (not-so correctly translated to English) long rhyme that describes your class based on their positions (monitor, assistant monitor etc) and individual characters? Well, I can't help but be impressed on the skill of making all of us, with our unique names and all, in rhyme. Even though some people are described more than others based on outstanding personality traits and also how well the creator of the seloka personally knows them, I find it real fun reading about the leader, the quiet, the class clowns, the smart, the little cliques of friends, etc. (for the record, I personally have been described as either 'quiet' or partnered with other friends as 'always together' in these kind of stuff.)

If I were to describe myself in a seloka, I'd say that I'm a dreamer.

Why do you say so, you ask? Well, because I know that at any given moment of the day, my over-active imagination is always at work of imagining myself or other people doing something, based on the observations that I have made. Confusing statement? Well, let me illustrate.

If I happen to be watching Akademi Fantasia or American Idol at the moment, I would imagine myself on world stage, signing my heart out on classy tunes that bring out the best of my imaginary vocal range and talents to fans watching in awe. When I'm done, they even give me a standing ovation! Wow, that must be great. From a typical middle-class schoolgirl I can rise up to nationwide recognition (or the alternative would be post videos of myself singing and playing music on Youtube and get discovered somehow just like Justin Bieber...look how famous he is now).

Another example would be if I saw a beauty pageant on TV (Miss Universe, Miss World etc) and saw the pretty international beauties waltz down with their flow-y hair and classy gowns, I will imagine myself wearing a designer gown gracefully down a long flight of stairs hearing "wow, she's gorgeous" and being escorted by a handsome host. Oh wait, I forgot the most important bit:  being crowned the world champion, then walking on the stage with a big bouquet doing the beauty queen wave. Wow.

A third, more down to earth situation that I find myself imagining a lot is about my future boyfriend/husband, uh, whoever he may be (I've already given him a lot of imaginary names already, mostly English names because I don't really imagine his race and the names can mean any ethnicity, but I won't state them here just in case that's coincidentally your name and I accidentally make you perasan xD) The trigger is every time I go out somewhere and see couples holding hands, or when some of my friends start talking about boys, or during weddings. Well, I'd start imagining him holding my hand, me feeding him popcorn at the movies, or him kissing me on the lips after the minister says 'you may kiss your bride'.

Well, I (and I think you too) can deduce two things from those three examples above:

1. I generally enjoy the spotlight a lot; and
2. I imagine things in detail.

There are many more things that I like to imagine: being declared the overall best STPM student in front of all my form 6 friends next year when we get our results, university life, studying law in UM for bachelors and in Oxford for Masters, my sister being a world-famous graphic designer, having kids of my own and imagining my parents becoming grandparents (I want to name my first girl Janelle because I love that name so much. As for boy's names, I haven't found a favorite yet), how my current group of friends would look in 10 years' time (married and with kids and running businesses), Recom/Remag being known, read and utilized by all Malaysian students locally and abroad, being an established writer making significant money just by living my passion, and the list can go on and on. Life and its possibilities are interesting, don't you think?

However, I use the word dreamer to describe myself because the examples above are mere dreams - they allow me to smile to myself often (if you observe my behavior in real life you'd notice that I smile to myself pretty often) and feel as if I was floating in clouds. However, reality is less sweet than imaginations, and I think we ll know that as sad yet true. However, to me, reality can be thought of in a positive manner - after all it's real when imagination is imaginary! Referring back to the three main examples that I mentioned above:

• Music does run in my family lineage (from my mom's side to be more specific - Dad can sing but he has other more outstanding areas of talent), so I believe that God has given me, my sister and my mom the ability to hit perfect pitch most of the time and sing in tune, as well as sing occasional harmony and play instruments (need practice on that though). However, I don't think professional singing is my calling as it's not the most outstanding talent of mine and I didn't really train up my vocal cords from young. Now there are two reasons I sing: to worship God, and as a form of entertainment cum stress-releasing technique.
• Beauty is a quality every girl seeks after - it's an universal female aim - and so when comparing myself to models in magazines and celebs, my body always seems less than perfect. However, I also make a conscious choice to love my body in all its imperfections, because I believe that God did not make a mistake when He created me. And, it's up to me to take good care of it. I love makeup, especially mascara as it defines my medium-long eyelashes and makes them look longer, but I've learned from my wise mom that makeup should only enhance and not cover up our natural beauty.
• About romantic feelings...well, I blab about it a lot in a few of my previous posts already, so I'm lazy to post about them again. Conclusion: I'm going to enjoy singleness to the max while waiting on God's timing for my future mate.

Having said all that, imagination has tremendously helped me in one area - my writing, especially when ideas come to me in my free time. My mom suggested that I should bring a notebook to jot down stuff wherever I go so that I don't forget ideas easily. Imagination is what is now driving me to join the July version of NaNoWriMo (I have STPM in November...) to write a Malaysian-style amateur novel on the theme of sincere, unadulterated friendship beyond socio-economic boundaries for fun (who knows, it might even get published one day?)

One last,more short term dream: If only I can waltz in in a pretty gown during my graduation ceremony this year as a co-emcee (hopefully, so that I can see how brave I've become in one and a half years of form six life with a previously 'as quiet as a mouse in school' record, and normally emcees come in a male-female pair so I'd have to become a co-emcee) looking confident and being myself up there? Well, it's a little far-fetched dream for now, and let's see what happens later...

Imagination, even though it may not be reality, is really sweet, and has been a real help in my writing as well as a driving force to make some of what were once dreams become a reality :)

My imagination runs free like children on a beach -- however, it needs to be tamed at times, too. (photo credits below)

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Images taken from here and here.

PS: I'll try my best not to write advice-y-preachy articles too often after this, and more sincere and down-to-earth ones like today's post. I'm getting tired of'em. Even when I do, I'd write my own experiences as opposed to 'we ought to' and 'we should'.

The Stereotypical (Malaysian) High School Essay

Today I'm gonna blab about writing.

Writing! Yes!

One of the things that I do while surfing the Net is to have a look at essays on various subjects, according to what tickles my fancy at given moments. As such, it is refreshing to see people write on various topics -- from how pretty the moon is to how to get over your ex, from politics to Shakespeare, and from computer geek stuff to tips on how to do high fashion, in various different perspectives and viewpoints. Using an example from above, the moon may cause one to remember his homeland while away from it-- as such is the case in many works of Chinese literature (yes, there are aspects of 11 years of Chinese education that are still in my head, somewhat.) -- or the moon may remind another of how time flies (for me, sunsets work the exact same way :)).

After all the wow-ing on works of inspiring literary art, or factual articles that stir up one's thoughts, I turn to some old buddies of mine -- revision books for high school essay writing. A quick glance and you realize that most of the facts are learned ones -- I mean that there are a series of main points for given subjects, that most people at that school age simply learn to memorize, as if History and the formulae for the maths and science subjects wasn't too much to memorize already...! It's normal, as many who have grown up under a similar education system are used and have used this way to score in our exams. Follow the formula of the past-year questions, we are told; is there any room for answers that are out of the ordinary, those that actually make interesting questions to ponder on, but fall outside the marking scheme?

For example, this is my take on a typical essay on one of the most common questions asked in school-level exams:

Q: What are the causes of social ills among youths today?

The somewhat stereotypical answer:

Introduction: Social issues are on the rise - has become a hot discussion topic in society - every day the media presents us with news on social ills committed by youth

Main points:
- parents too materialistic - put career first - don't pay attention to what is going on in children's lives - children don't get adequate love and attention -turn to social ills for satisfaction
- influenced by peers that have a negative influence - want to feel accepted by peer group, so give in
- not enough religious and moral education at home - children don't have strong moral stand
- mass media influence - Western culture - too much sex and violence - loss of Eastern values
- a teen's natural desires - curiosity - want to try everything and do everything

Conclusion: everyone needs to work together hand-in-hand to solve this problem so that our youth will have a future.

If I were to ask you, the recent product of a typical Malaysian high school, to come up with an essay titled above, chances are many of you will have at least two similar points as stated above. However, let's scrutinize the same essay above to make it a little more out of the box, a little more unique, shall we?

*Warning: I have no guarantee that the way that I write below will guarantee good marks for your next essay paper. However, by using your own style, I can assure you that your piece will definitely be more unique than the cookie-cutter example I gave earlier.

Q: What are the causes of social ills among youths today?


Introduction: What do you know about social ills? Try to define it in your own words, or search a reputable dictionary for the definition if you so desire. If you are the well-read kind, throw in a few stats, or a recent news article regarding social ills, even better! If you're not the well-read kind yet, do note that for factual essays such as these, you'd need writing flair...but also facts as well, and both in your essay enriches it :) Reading the news often really helps.

Now for the main points - I'll tackle them one-by-one. (Haha, be patient yea..)

• On the role of parents -- no, I actually think we should start with the teen him/herself. In my honest opinion, many high school essays describe (and indirectly blame) parents, media, etc for social ills, which although is undeniably true in certain aspects, tends to neglect the personal responsibility on the teen's part. Now I shall shift my last point in the previous essay here: the teen is curious and wants to try everything. Well, I think the proper word for it is not so much about curiosity, it's rebellion! Curiosity is a trait, I think, that we possess since childhood. Remember when mom whacked your hand because you tried to reach for a cookie in a high cupboard, or touch an electrical outlet...you get the drill. I feel that rebellion is more prevalent in determining involvement in social ills - the teen years is where we want to challenge societal rules and regulations to test them, instead of doing as mom and dad and teacher say. So, I'd say that rebellion, coupled with curiosity we had since we were kids, causes teens to experiment by getting involved in social ills.
• Now we shift to the role of the parents -- no, I meant the family unit as a whole -- that causes teens to dabble with social ills. Now, the case of the materialistic parent is true -- those who produce latch-key children while focusing on advancing in career does cause detachment from the parents. However, I'm considering the role of the wider family in this, too -- as well as habits practiced by parents regardless of social status. What about sibling rivalry? Expectations of relatives (especially those who are always comparing one cousin to another)? Favoring one child over another due to talent/gender/looks, etc? Then bad habits of certain parents: If dad/mom is a drinker, gambler, womanizer, cheater, and they fight/beat the other party up (all this can happen within all social statuses), what kind of environment do you expect the child to grow up in?
• Next, we move to the role of the friends. The herd mentality is very real -- as a teen (I still am one) it's extremely, extremely hard to stand alone with no peer support, and many succumb to peer pressure -- even if it wasn't on heavier social issues, one friend playing truant can easily result in her whole gang not showing up for school, for instance. However, note that the kid also needs to choose bad hats as friends before being bad themselves, and knowing that we choose friends mostly based on interest, what determines the kid's interest? We all have dreams for our future, but the failure to focus on a dream (due to circumstances and influence) as well as a lack of discernment on what's good and what's bad diverts one's attention on less important things...or to eventual crime.
• On the point on religious and moral education, I think it is valid, and that it needs to start from the home, but normally this point doesn't get too much elaboration. It's not only religious rites that have to be thought, but the practicing and application of values and principles that provide a foundation for a person's character. After all, there are those who look pious on the outside, practicing religion and morals often, yet the person inside is contradictory to what is shown outside (In this matter, I need to admit that I show it, too, and I am frustrated when the mask that I wear outside is inconsistent with the doubt and immaturity that is inside. More on that in today's Daily)
• Now, on media. It's true that Western influence has brought a lot of sex and violence into our media system -- but I think that we're pushing all the blame to them. After all, we accepted it when we could have blocked everything, and sometimes I think that there are those, too, who like and do all these stuff but need to hide under our so-called Eastern culture, which those actions are hypocrisy in my opinion because these people show one face and do another. When it comes to stuff like this, the tendency to blame others while portraying ourselves as better or holier is there. I believe that each world civilization has its good and bad points, and that instead of pointing fingers (i.e writing that it's all someone's fault), we should learn the good of each side and filter out the bad, which in this case is negative input of Western media, using again the timeless gift of discernment.

Conclusion: Now, try to conclude without the word 'in conclusion' in the essay. Not that doing it is wrong, but I want to show you that it's possible. How, you ask? By implying the conclusion - essentially wrapping the essay in a nutshell. Here's my example:

Social ills have become a regular phenomenon in society due to the failures of both the teens themselves and those around them to play their part in making sure that the teen chooses the right path in life instead of turning to social ills, that can potentially lead to crime. It is therefore vital that no matter who we are in society, we play an active role in nurturing our future generation so that they can not only grow personally, but also contribute to the growth and strengthening of the family unit, the society, as well as the future of our country.

In the example above I took the basic idea of 'everyone needs to work together' and expanded its scope.

So there you have it -- your stereotypical Malaysian high school essay, version 1.0, and it's proposed improvements. Now, I'm no essay or language expert; due to my passion for writing, I want to show writing that breaks away from the cookie-cutter high school one and introduce a personal element of flair (coupled with facts in a factual article, and imagination in fiction) to my essays. Feel free to add your own points (I know I didn't include all the points above...) or even to disagree with my points above, as above is my personal opinion on how to do the essay and we all have our own POV.

Hope you enjoyed today's post :)

Image taken from here.

Distractions In A Busy, Busy World (Part 2)

In Part 1, I listed down the 3 major reasons on why (I think) we tend to get distracted so easily. In this post, I'm going to explore some of the ways to deal with the distractions that we face.

I'm going to cut straight to the chase today. The following are some ways that we can deal with distraction, from various sources and also personal experience:

• Allow for distractions. This, I believe, even though it seemingly contradicts the whole idea of minimizing distractions, is one of the most effective methods to curb distraction. Why, you ask? Have you heard of the saying 'forbidden fruit tastes the sweetest'? It means that the more something is prohibited, the more people actually want to do it. Just look at your typical high school for some live examples. Distractions happen because most work is stressful, and they provide a means of de-stressing. In this case a certain amount of distractions are actually good for us, since 'all work and no play make Jack a dull boy', so the temptation to be distracted is lessened when we actually allow some of it in our schedules, i.e 5 minutes of Internet-surfing, newspaper reading, Farmville-playing etc. However, do time your distractions; don't get too distracted until you forget that there's work to be done!

• Make a to-do list. After that, stick it in the most obvious of places, put reminders all over on your phone, laptop and iPad, and (if you can) tell everyone that is around you and/or working with you about what you're supposed to do. Of course, you can skip one or more steps that I mentioned earlier (except the to-do list, that's the most important part) if you possess more generous amounts of the ability of un-forgetfulness, but my point here is that this simple mechanism helps to bring priority in the tasks that we supposed to do. A numbered list or one that has large to small font (in order of importance) helps accentuate this purpose better. Here's an example of what I'm going to do after I finish publishing this post:

1. Take out my Business Studies 1 textbook, notebook and my smart notes book and start doing some study notes. 
2. While taking a break, draft my post on today's Daily.
3. Continue studying.
4. 2nd break (my afternoon break is longer because I can't really focus during the afternoon) : Schedule posts + load Lower Six orientation pics to my school's Form Six page (where I'd just became a co-admin)
5. ...and so on and so forth.

• Invest in a timer. This simple device helps me to keep track of time while doing stuff, as when we are so into something, be it work or entertainment, we lose track of the time that is passing us by. Setting a timer helps me keep a reality check on how important the task is, as well as remind me that as important or exciting the thing I'm doing is, there are other things to do, too. The timer that I have is a 1-hour timer, as most of the things I do can be divided into less than 1-hour chunks. (Trust me, when you set more than an hour for doing anything, restlessness sets in easily, and so does the temptation to be distracted...!

• Occasional treats do work. I mentioned earlier that distractions should be allowed to de-stress. Here, I'm emphasizing the same principle except that this one comes in the form of rewards. After an hour of grueling work, do something that you enjoy (preferably not internet or TV-related as that may strain your eyes). Calling someone to chat, going out for a stroll in the garden, playing with your pet, playing a musical instrument, and (occasionally) enjoying a snack such as chocolate helps keep the mind fresh :)

• Be accountable for your important tasks. It really helps me to have at least one other person asking me if I have finished something. It actually happens all the time -- can you remember the last time mom asked you to fold your blanket or do your dishes -- and even though it can be quite annoying at times, you are actually reminded that there's something that you need to finish. So, the next time you need to do something, it helps when someone is there to reinforce it by gently reminding you. Now I know the ideal student is one who can do stuff without being told -- and we are all aiming for that -- but I'm referring to reminding versus. telling, and here I'd like to stress that we shouldn't be over-reliant on reminders as they are there to reinforce something that we need to do.

So there you have it. I've listed 5 ideas that have, at one time or another, worked for me. I am no expert in human behavior, I'm just a girl with personal opinions based on experience and I hope that these tips can help you too :) I've decided to do away with part 3, as the ideas in this part cover the content that I had originally intended to post there. Also, this blog will now start focusing on current issues and also things that relate to students in the 16-23 age range, and understanding for the rest :)

Image sources (in order of appearance): (1), (2), (3), (4), (5)